people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
