Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
