woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
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I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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