I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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