I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize