Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
