the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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