Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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