Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
