So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
