I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
