Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
