I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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