I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
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