1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
