The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
