you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
