I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
vagina is talking i cant
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
