How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
