so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
