very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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