problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
