Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
