The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
