we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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