Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?