Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize