she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
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