Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Randomize
