Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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