i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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