He asked me if I "almost moaned"
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize