U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
