I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
