btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
