Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
It's blow job season.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
