Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  Hey, what are you up to?

  (802): View more from Vermont

  Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.

  (802): View more from Vermont

  Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.

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  (831): Hey, what are you up to? (802): Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds. (802): Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard. http://tfl.nu/ope5
  Replies (16) Good night (2726) Bad night (1008)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  @ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu

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  (248): @ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu <3 (1-248): please stop breathing. http://tfl.nu/7uu5
  Replies (36) Good night (880) Bad night (5132)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain

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  (302): I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain http://tfl.nu/18xp
  Replies (22) Good night (1357) Bad night (4318)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.

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  (503): I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much. http://tfl.nu/97de
  Replies (22) Good night (4179) Bad night (913)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?

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  (239): Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls? http://tfl.nu/pmwm
  Replies (11) Good night (5190) Bad night (1022)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?

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  (248): Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower? http://tfl.nu/qrst
  Replies (5) Good night (1056) Bad night (2253)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer

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  (410): The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer http://tfl.nu/0sxh
  Replies (5) Good night (1620) Bad night (1117)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants

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  (231): the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants http://tfl.nu/ctb5
  Replies (4) Good night (1857) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.

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  (206): I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous. http://tfl.nu/0ln2
  Replies (7) Good night (2734) Bad night (576)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college

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  (585): It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college http://tfl.nu/6ip8
  Replies (5) Good night (539) Bad night (1488)
• Favorite

  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm cool with that

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  (339): I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo (781): I'm cool with that http://tfl.nu/a1rl
  Replies (3) Good night (1472) Bad night (395)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.

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  (402): No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn. http://tfl.nu/c09n
  Replies (1) Good night (368) Bad night (635)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.

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  (304): And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence. http://tfl.nu/3w59
  Replies (3) Good night (582) Bad night (313)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.

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  (860): Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me. http://tfl.nu/l2ve
  Replies (5) Good night (798) Bad night (330)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.

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  (585): You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away. http://tfl.nu/8ccj
  Replies (2) Good night (720) Bad night (347)

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