Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize