Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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