Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
