No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
