So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
We're too hungover to prance.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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