Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
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