rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
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He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
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I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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