The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is Oprah even human
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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