yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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