For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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