You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
