I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize