Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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