Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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