I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
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looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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